Hello Readers,
I do apologize for the long absence in posts. I have been very, very, very busy! Still, that is no excuse for my inconsistencies. With that being said, I should catch you up on what has been going on since my last post. I may have informed you of some of these things before but I just want to be sure I have covered all of my bases.
So, since last year, around this time (it will be a year in May since my disastrous ending of engagement), God has done some pretty amazing things! I mean, doors have been opened in Ministry and in the workforce. God has catapulted me in the leading of Praise and Worship. I have been released spiritually to go forth and lead people in ushering in the presence of God through worship. Now, this may not seem like a big deal to you but it is a major deal to me.
Since I was a little girl, I have wanted to be a Psalmist. A weird fantasy for a child, I know. When I was about 8 or 9 years old, my church had a woman by the name of Diane Palmer as a guest speaker. She ministered and prophesied to people through song. I thought she was so heavenly and wonderful. At that moment, I told God I wanted to do exactly what she does! My mother bought me all of her tapes and a cassette player. I would listen to them all of the time and sing along. God placed a desire of worship in me at a very young age. I was prophesied to by Juanita Bynum when I was maybe around 11or 12. She didn't say much, just "It's on you". I was not sure exactly what "it" was at the time. Then when I was a few years older, my Pastor's wife spoke over me and told me that I would lead many to victory.
Well, the only way I have learned to achieve my own victories was through my pure, unadulterated, open heart worship. Without worship, I would not be able to survive anything the enemy has attempted to tear me down with. Whether it's singing to myself at home, listening to William McDowell or some other worship artist that ministers to my soul, or singing in the choir/congregation at church. My heart was made to worship and that is exactly why the enemy attempts so many attacks on it so much. My worship is for real. It comes directly from my heart. I need to pour my heart out to God so that He can pour Himself into it!
So, with all of that, being able to lead people to God through the avenue that I personally use to get to Him is an honor and a dream of mine! I could not have been more fulfilled by knowing that I was beginning to develop and go forth in the very thing I was created for, and people have been blessed by it! So my lesson from my heartache was that God may remove one thing from you that you loved/thought you loved so much and replace it with something even more wonderful and fulfilling. He will not allow you to be empty and lost. I am so grateful to know that God loves me so much to make sure I am happier than any mortal man could have ever made me! Leading worship is a great responsibility and an honorable privilege and I am so delighted that God chose me!
With regards to the workforce. I have a new, less stressful job! And it happens to be in the city I love!!! God knew my heart. I love to help kids and families but the stress of my previous position had begun to weigh on me so heavy that I was actually considering quitting with nothing set up to fall back on. I was ready to get out. When I returned from my month off last June, I knew it was time to go! Let me tell you how awesome God is! When you call on Him for help, He will come just when you need Him!
So, after returning back to work, there was a chance to volunteer for a work project that would remove my caseload and allow me to focus solely on the project. I would not have to go into people's homes anymore for approximately 6 months, when the project ended. Of course I volunteered but I was not chosen. I did not give up hope. I knew how tired I was and I knew God was not going to make me stay in that stressful position for long. In the mean time, I was applying for other, less stressful, position within my state trying to get an interview somewhere. I was interviewed in August of 2013 for a position that would take me out of the field and place me in an office. A much safer and way less stressful position. I did not hear anything for weeks and I began to get a little restless...BUT GOD.
While I waited on a call back from my interview, another opportunity was opened to volunteer for that same work project. The agency needed more volunteers to go outside of their current offices into different ones. Of course, in hopes of getting me off of cases, I volunteered. Still believing God was going to do something for me. He did! I was offered a volunteer position in a different county which actually happened to be closer to my parents' house, where I was living temporarily, than my actual permanent office. It worked out wonderfully! Although I was still waiting on the call from that permanent position I had interviewed for, I was able to be freed of the stress of my current position for a while, until that door opened! You ever hear the saying, "until God opens the next door, praise Him in the hallway"? Well that project was my hallway! I praised Him for that position with my belief still high that the job I interviewed for was mine!
After accepting that volunteer position, I received an invitation to interview for that other position a second time. I didn't mind. I went through with the interview in September and patiently waited for a response. I never received a yes or no for months. Finally, in December, I was asked to interview again! Third time's a charm, right? I interviewed a third time. Now while all of this was going on, some changes came about with that volunteer position. Because the deadline for the launch of the new application had been extended to an unknown date, permanent offices had begun pulling their workers back to caseloads when they needed them. I started to worry that I would have to go back to the stress. I wasn't sure what would happen. I continued to pray and still believed that God was not going to allow me to go back. People were going back to cases 2 by 2.
Approximately 2 weeks before my name was up to be chosen to be sent back, guess who called?! The position I had interviewed for 3 times! They offered me the position a couple of weeks before Christmas! Can you say the best Christmas gift I received in a while!!! God may not come when you want Him but He is ALWAYS right on time! I began working my new position in mid January of 2014 in my new, wonderful city that I love so much! I was blessed enough to have a wonderful friend who allowed me to stay with her and help out with her bills for a few months until I found my own place. As of 3/13/14, I received the keys to my new home and I am now a resident of my wonderful, new city!
Which brings me to my reason for not posting in a long while. I have been busy trying to get settled in. Moving to a new city is very overwhelming. My family lives some time away, not very far, but far enough. I have been trying to motivate myself to do the things I set out to do. I work new hours so I have most of my day to me. My plan for this year is to write my first book. I have not made much hedge way on it as of yet; I have an introduction and maybe page one. With all of the hustle and bustle of moving, plus work, plus buying new things for my new place, plus figuring out a budget, plus trying to find a place of worship to connect with, I have been so exhausted. I feel very bad about my lack of motivation and I almost feel like I am wasting time. I have let 3 whole months of the year go by. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I am in a wedding in May; so I have to get the dress, have it altered, get some dyeable shoes, have them died the color of the dress if I can ever get a swatch of the dress which I have requested be mailed twice and have not gotten it. There is just so much going on at one time!
I decided to force myself to do what I need to do. I have to pursue my passion because I won't progress if I don't. The good news is, I have found a wonderful church that I am planning to connect and become involved with. I am very excited about that! My life means nothing if I cannot serve in some type of way in Ministry. I have to contribute to the body! So that is one step. One accomplishment. I have unpacked and put away most all of my things; well, what I was able to get here on my own. The rest of my things at my parents' place is another story.
Have you ever been tired of feeling like every minute that passes is a wasted minute because you're not doing what you set out to do? We have to motivate ourselves! We have to carve out specific time for what it is we NEED to do, not just what we want to do. This post is the beginning for me. I realize I have encouraged so many of you with my writing, whether you voice it to me or you have just been reading through every one of the post. I am not living for myself. I know that. I would like you to accept my sincere apology. We are still on this journey together! I have not abandoned you! I am still running the race with you and we are all headed towards that which is Greater!
I hope this post gives you even a small glimmer of hope that if you continue to believe that God will not leave in the condition/position you are in for long. Keep believing, keep confessing, and keep holding on because you know what???
GREATER IS COMING!
I love you all!
Keya <3
No comments:
Post a Comment