Hey Guys! This one is just for you. I realize sometimes guys need tips on the "how to's" on approaching and being with a woman. You may think you have your game tight but if you are looking for a lifetime woman; a REAL, mature woman, I can share a few tips with you. Of course the MAIN and MOST IMPORTANT thing you need is a REAL RELATIONSHIP with God before you approach any REAL woman. Not one of them gangsta rapper's, "I'd like to give honor to God", relationships. You need to truly be chasing after God and love Him more than you love ANYTHING or ANYONE on this earth.
I will start with the small feats first. Although you may think these things are no big deal, to women they say a lot!
Your approach: The way you look and the way you smell says a lot to a woman.
1. Make sure that you are well-groomed, i.e., fresh cut, fresh shave, neat, clean clothes (the ones that fit, not that extra baggy, saggy, stuff), nice cologne (not the whole bottle though, that makes us sick to the stomach), etc. Us women take time in making sure we are well kept and so should you. It makes you appear well put together and organized. Like you have a purpose and you're not just wandering around here aimlessly looking for the next piece of, you know what, to get in your bed. Oh, and REAL WOMEN, are NOT attracted to the marijuana smell. It's revolting! It says that you are lazy, immature, and need to grow up. That may not be the case for you but that is what that smell says.
2. ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS have fresh breath! Stale or bad breath can be an IMMEDIATE turn off! Make sure to have a fresh piece of minty gum or some type of mint in your mouth when you go to talk to a woman. If you have been chewing your piece of gum for an hour, spit it out and put in a brand new piece right before you approach the woman. It may seem simple, but good smelling, minty breath is VERY attractive! Bad, stale breath is offensive. Be courteous enough to make sure she has a pleasant experience when she is speaking with you in close range. It will make her more apt to want to kiss you once you start getting to know each other better. Bad breath will make her not want to talk to you face to face but rather over the phone or by text and if she does talk to you in person, she will keep her distance and a kiss will be the furthest thing from her mind. So, always do a breath check, whether you ask a friend if it smells ok or just be on the safe side and pop in a fresh new piece of gum. NEVER chew the fruity gum. That does not work at all. AND NEVER EVER POP YOUR GUM. That is a bit girly and will make you look a little suspect.
(Number 2 was long but I am telling you, it is VERY important)
3. When you ask for her name, REMEMBER IT. If you have to repeat it over and over in your head so that you don't forget, do that. If you do forget, ask her again. She's a lady. She is not your "Ma". You just met her so she is not your "boo" or "baby". Although it is flattering to be thought of as "sexy" by a man, that's not the only thing we want to be known for. Calling us "sexy" makes a woman think the first thing your thinking of is sex. (As you can see I said it makes a WOMAN feel that way, a girl will probably eat it right up and give you exactly what you want). Women like to be respected and to feel like they matter. Forgetting their name right away and not taking the time to ask again is selfish and disrespectful. Just ask. And if you do remember, it makes a woman feel like you actually care.
4. Be confident but don't be over confident or "cocky". Women like a man who appears to know exactly what he wants and who has faith in himself. Timidity is not attractive at all. If you're going to do something, do it. Although you may be nervous as ever, don't let us see it. Keep yourself together. It exhibits some strength from you and gives a woman a sense of security that you aren't afraid. Makes her feel as though, someday, you will be able to protect her and that she can look to you to be her rock when she needs you to. When she sees nerves and knows you're scared about this or that, it makes her feel like she's going to have to do the protecting. NO WOMAN wants to have to protect herself and her man all of the time! If that's the case, she may as well stay single. Although, later down the line, once you are closer; sharing a few of your fears with her will bring you closer as a couple but spilling every single fear you have right in the beginning will make her think twice about if you are going to be man enough to take care of her. She will begin to see you as the one she is going have to pick up and cradle in her arms like a baby. She dose NOT want to be your mama.
5. Be masculine. Exhibit your manly side. Although, sensitivity is sweet and it is nice to know that you're not made of complete stone, if you are in your feelings more than she is then you are out of balance. Men are masculine, women are feminine. If you take all of the femininity, what's left for her? DO NOT steal her role as a woman. I am not saying you shouldn't be lovey dovey with your woman, just give her the opportunity to initiate the mushy stuff. Don't be beating her to the punch every single time. It can get a little frustrating for her because it makes her feel like she cannot be the soft, sensual woman that she is because you are! Be the MAN she wants and needs. Speak with authority, love her, and be sensitive to her feelings but don't be all in yours. There needs to be a balance so that you're not stepping too far over into her territory and she's not stepping too far over into yours.
6. Be Honest. NEVER start any relationship with a lie. If you cannot be honest with her, you are not ready for her. She's not the one for you. Trust is earned. You don't have her trust, you'll never have her! Psalm 34:13 reads "Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from deceit". Proverbs12:17 reads, "He who speaks truth declares righteousness, but a false witness, deceit". Verse 19 reads, "The truthful lip shall be established forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment". And verse 22, "Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who deal truthfully are His delight".
7. Be Friends. Being able to communicate with the woman you're with is important. If you two build a friendship, it will be much easier to communicate. You build a rapport with one another, you learn one another, and you begin to trust one another. Being friends is a major deal. Being able to laugh together, play together, learn together, and grow together will really set a strong foundation in your relationship. Don't make up in your mind, "I'm her man, she's my woman" and that's it. That's when you get all paranoid, possessive, jealous, etc. That's not hot at all. Proverbs 17:17 reads, "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity". You two should be so close as friends that you are like family. Not in a weird, incest way but you are growing into the family you will create someday.
8. Be Dependable. Be there when she needs you. If she has to depend on her parents more than she can depend on you. That is a problem! You may not be ready to be the man for her. Make sure you are capable of being there when she calls on you because if she can't depend on you, then who else can she depend on? You don't want her to have to go to outside sources. She needs to be able to have faith in whatever she needs, she can always count on you!
9. Make Her Feel Special. She should have all the confidence in the world that she is YOUR ONE AND ONLY. She should never be made to feel otherwise. You must reassure her that she's all you ever want and need. Not just with words but with action also. She should not be treated the same as any of the other female friends you may have. There should be a clear distinction between the way you treat her and the way you treat other women. She should NEVER feel like she has to share you with ANYONE. She should never have to ask you to change the way you behave with this woman or that woman. She should never have to wonder about your friendship with another woman. She should always be in the know and you should respect her enough to make sure she is always in the know and knows the truth about everything.
10. Love Her. Love is more than just a word or some sweet words you text to her in the morning or throughout the day. Love is an action! The things you do for her, with her in mind, etc., all show that you love her. The people you hang out with, the things you talk about with others when it comes to her are all examples of your love for her. She should NEVER EVER have to wonder about your love for her. She should never have to question your love. Figure out new, innovative ways to show her that you love her every single day. It does not stop when you marry her either. You have to invent ways to profess your undying love for her over and over again until God decides He needs her back up in Heaven.
Ok, I could go on and on but that should be good enough for now. I hope this helps some guy, any guy out there who needs a little help with pursuing the girl of his dreams. Here's one freebie tip: NEVER STOP PURSUING HER. Unless she has made it clear that there is never going to be anything between you two, pursue her even after you put a ring on it. Don't be a stalker though. No really does mean No. If she says no, she wasn't the one. Keep things in prayer also. Pray about who God wants you to pursue.
You have all the power within you to get what you want or who you want, you just have to know how to use it and you need to use it in the right way. Your Good Thing is waiting for you, you just have to find her!
Hope this helps a little.
Keya
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Friday, April 4, 2014
Make This Your Confession
Hey There!
I want to share something with you. I know that a lot of us have gone through or may currently be going through something whether it be financial, relational, spiritual, etc. This is a confession I put together for myself a few years back when I was going through something myself. It really helped me get through and it is all from the word of God. I said it every single day until I really began to be confident in my words. It is my pleasure to share it with you. Here it is:
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in me. But may the God of all grace, who called me to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after I have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle me. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but we war against the powers of darkness, therefore I will humble myself under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt me in due time, casting all my cares upon Him, for He cares for me. I will wait on you Lord and be of good courage so that You can strengthen my heart; as my hope is totally in You. Create in me a clean heart, O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me, do not cast me away from Your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore me to the joy of Your salvation and uphold me by Your generous Spirit. As I trust in you Lord and lean not on my own understanding, I’ll acknowledge you in all my ways, giving you total authority over the direction of my paths. Then transgressors will know Your ways through me, and sinners will be converted to You. To God be the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.
We all need to remind ourselves of the true word of God sometimes. We all need something to hold on to. Let God excite you with His blessed word. Let the word comfort you. Pray these words, these scriptures, and watch your life began to change. Watch as your heart begins to heal. Watch as God begins to give you such a peace YOU will even be amazed! God is faithful! Remember that!
Don't give up when it gets a little bit harder, when you get down because you can't see how things will work out. Remember that God has a master plan and His glory is going to be revealed in you! GREATER IS COMING...don't lose hope!
Love you!
Keya
P.S. if you would like a copy of where to find the scriptures, comment below. :)
I want to share something with you. I know that a lot of us have gone through or may currently be going through something whether it be financial, relational, spiritual, etc. This is a confession I put together for myself a few years back when I was going through something myself. It really helped me get through and it is all from the word of God. I said it every single day until I really began to be confident in my words. It is my pleasure to share it with you. Here it is:
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in me. But may the God of all grace, who called me to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after I have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle me. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but we war against the powers of darkness, therefore I will humble myself under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt me in due time, casting all my cares upon Him, for He cares for me. I will wait on you Lord and be of good courage so that You can strengthen my heart; as my hope is totally in You. Create in me a clean heart, O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me, do not cast me away from Your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore me to the joy of Your salvation and uphold me by Your generous Spirit. As I trust in you Lord and lean not on my own understanding, I’ll acknowledge you in all my ways, giving you total authority over the direction of my paths. Then transgressors will know Your ways through me, and sinners will be converted to You. To God be the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.
We all need to remind ourselves of the true word of God sometimes. We all need something to hold on to. Let God excite you with His blessed word. Let the word comfort you. Pray these words, these scriptures, and watch your life began to change. Watch as your heart begins to heal. Watch as God begins to give you such a peace YOU will even be amazed! God is faithful! Remember that!
Don't give up when it gets a little bit harder, when you get down because you can't see how things will work out. Remember that God has a master plan and His glory is going to be revealed in you! GREATER IS COMING...don't lose hope!
Love you!
Keya
P.S. if you would like a copy of where to find the scriptures, comment below. :)
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Yesterday
Good morning to you. It's about 10am where I am. Good day to everyone in different time zones!
I wanted to share a song with you today. It's called 'Yesterday' by Mary Mary. For those of you who don't know, Mary Mary is a gospel singing duo, a couple of sisters who have been very prominent in the gospel arena. Anyhow, there Lyrics are as follows:
I wanted to share a song with you today. It's called 'Yesterday' by Mary Mary. For those of you who don't know, Mary Mary is a gospel singing duo, a couple of sisters who have been very prominent in the gospel arena. Anyhow, there Lyrics are as follows:
I had enough heartache and enough
headaches
I've had so many ups and downs
Don't know how much more I can take
See, I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
I've had so many ups and downs
Don't know how much more I can take
See, I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
Either I'm going to trust you or I may
as well walk away
'Cause stressing don't make it better
Don't make it better, no way
See, I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
'Cause stressing don't make it better
Don't make it better, no way
See, I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
Yesterday, oh, yesterday
I decided to put my trust in you
Oh, oh, yesterday, yesterday
I realized that you will bring me through
I decided to put my trust in you
Oh, oh, yesterday, yesterday
I realized that you will bring me through
There ain't nothing too hard for my
God, no
Any problems that I have
He's greater, greater than them all
So I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
Any problems that I have
He's greater, greater than them all
So I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday
Yesterday, oh, yesterday
I decided that I could put my trust in you
Oh, oh, yesterday
I realized that you would bring me through
I decided that I could put my trust in you
Oh, oh, yesterday
I realized that you would bring me through
There ain't nothing too hard for my
God, no
Any problems that I have
He's greater than them all
So I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday.
Any problems that I have
He's greater than them all
So I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday.
The group has a reality show and this has been one of the songs that they have been singing on their tour during the show this season. One of the sisters is currently dealing with her husband being unfaithful in their marriage, and of course, she is emotionally drained. As I watched the show and listened to them sing the song, I could not help but be reminded of my own situation. The difference with my situation is that God saw the cheater in my guy beforehand and rescued me from the excruciating pain of marrying a man who would eventually humiliate me by having an illegitimate child outside of our marriage. I am more than grateful for God's hand upon my life.
The pain of the situation has greatly subsided, yes, but the last couple of weeks, I found myself thinking about the past. I found myself thinking of the good memories we shared and the good feelings he gave me, then I began to wonder why again. Why would he do this to me? How could he be so cruel and have no remorse? How can he just not care about what we shared for the prior 2 years? Of course as the thoughts began to flow, so did the tears. You know, the battlefield really is in your mind. I realized, because of my thinking, I felt like I was reverting back to where I was almost a year ago; to the very first day of the breakup when my heart hurt the most. I found myself begging God to just help me not to care anymore. I am tired of caring, I am tired of being the one who is hurt while he has moved along happy with his new baby and now family with this woman and her children.
Listening to this song and actually reading the lyrics helped me to realize that I am not trusting the Lord. One line of the song says, "either I'm going to trust you, or I mays as well walk away, cause stressing don't make it better no way". That's absolutely true. My stressing, begging, and crying about it did not help me one bit. Proverbs 3:5 reads: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not to your own understanding. All my why and how questions are me trying to understand. It is our human nature to want to understand but I realize I don't need to understand, I just need to trust! I also need to stay buried in the word of God. Proverbs 16:20 reads: He who heeds the word wisely will find good, and whoever trusts in the Lord, happy is he.
Again, I will share with you, that which is one of my favorite scriptures; Jeremiah 29:11 which reads: For I know the thoughts I think toward you, says he Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. God plans for me are peace that surpasses all understanding! Philippians 4:7 reads: And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ. Of course, verse six talks about not worrying but instead telling God everything that we need and want in prayer, supplication, and thanksgiving; then the peace will follow.
So, this song, Yesterday, speaks great volumes! I have literally decided that I cried my last tear yesterday. No more! I will trust God and allow his peace to surpass my understanding of anything. I don't have to have understanding if I have His peace! Understanding is irrelevant. Peace is much more valuable. No more tears, no more wondering and questions. God's plans are great for us! I charge you today to make the decision to have cried your last tear yesterday. Or if you have to let today be your yesterday, tomorrow cry no more.
There is peace for you. There is strength for you. There is hope for you. There is a future for you. And most of all....THERE IS GREATER FOR YOU! Leave the past where it is and look ahead because your GREATER IS COMING!
Love you! *mwah*
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Motivate Yourself
Hello Readers,
I do apologize for the long absence in posts. I have been very, very, very busy! Still, that is no excuse for my inconsistencies. With that being said, I should catch you up on what has been going on since my last post. I may have informed you of some of these things before but I just want to be sure I have covered all of my bases.
So, since last year, around this time (it will be a year in May since my disastrous ending of engagement), God has done some pretty amazing things! I mean, doors have been opened in Ministry and in the workforce. God has catapulted me in the leading of Praise and Worship. I have been released spiritually to go forth and lead people in ushering in the presence of God through worship. Now, this may not seem like a big deal to you but it is a major deal to me.
Since I was a little girl, I have wanted to be a Psalmist. A weird fantasy for a child, I know. When I was about 8 or 9 years old, my church had a woman by the name of Diane Palmer as a guest speaker. She ministered and prophesied to people through song. I thought she was so heavenly and wonderful. At that moment, I told God I wanted to do exactly what she does! My mother bought me all of her tapes and a cassette player. I would listen to them all of the time and sing along. God placed a desire of worship in me at a very young age. I was prophesied to by Juanita Bynum when I was maybe around 11or 12. She didn't say much, just "It's on you". I was not sure exactly what "it" was at the time. Then when I was a few years older, my Pastor's wife spoke over me and told me that I would lead many to victory.
Well, the only way I have learned to achieve my own victories was through my pure, unadulterated, open heart worship. Without worship, I would not be able to survive anything the enemy has attempted to tear me down with. Whether it's singing to myself at home, listening to William McDowell or some other worship artist that ministers to my soul, or singing in the choir/congregation at church. My heart was made to worship and that is exactly why the enemy attempts so many attacks on it so much. My worship is for real. It comes directly from my heart. I need to pour my heart out to God so that He can pour Himself into it!
So, with all of that, being able to lead people to God through the avenue that I personally use to get to Him is an honor and a dream of mine! I could not have been more fulfilled by knowing that I was beginning to develop and go forth in the very thing I was created for, and people have been blessed by it! So my lesson from my heartache was that God may remove one thing from you that you loved/thought you loved so much and replace it with something even more wonderful and fulfilling. He will not allow you to be empty and lost. I am so grateful to know that God loves me so much to make sure I am happier than any mortal man could have ever made me! Leading worship is a great responsibility and an honorable privilege and I am so delighted that God chose me!
With regards to the workforce. I have a new, less stressful job! And it happens to be in the city I love!!! God knew my heart. I love to help kids and families but the stress of my previous position had begun to weigh on me so heavy that I was actually considering quitting with nothing set up to fall back on. I was ready to get out. When I returned from my month off last June, I knew it was time to go! Let me tell you how awesome God is! When you call on Him for help, He will come just when you need Him!
So, after returning back to work, there was a chance to volunteer for a work project that would remove my caseload and allow me to focus solely on the project. I would not have to go into people's homes anymore for approximately 6 months, when the project ended. Of course I volunteered but I was not chosen. I did not give up hope. I knew how tired I was and I knew God was not going to make me stay in that stressful position for long. In the mean time, I was applying for other, less stressful, position within my state trying to get an interview somewhere. I was interviewed in August of 2013 for a position that would take me out of the field and place me in an office. A much safer and way less stressful position. I did not hear anything for weeks and I began to get a little restless...BUT GOD.
While I waited on a call back from my interview, another opportunity was opened to volunteer for that same work project. The agency needed more volunteers to go outside of their current offices into different ones. Of course, in hopes of getting me off of cases, I volunteered. Still believing God was going to do something for me. He did! I was offered a volunteer position in a different county which actually happened to be closer to my parents' house, where I was living temporarily, than my actual permanent office. It worked out wonderfully! Although I was still waiting on the call from that permanent position I had interviewed for, I was able to be freed of the stress of my current position for a while, until that door opened! You ever hear the saying, "until God opens the next door, praise Him in the hallway"? Well that project was my hallway! I praised Him for that position with my belief still high that the job I interviewed for was mine!
After accepting that volunteer position, I received an invitation to interview for that other position a second time. I didn't mind. I went through with the interview in September and patiently waited for a response. I never received a yes or no for months. Finally, in December, I was asked to interview again! Third time's a charm, right? I interviewed a third time. Now while all of this was going on, some changes came about with that volunteer position. Because the deadline for the launch of the new application had been extended to an unknown date, permanent offices had begun pulling their workers back to caseloads when they needed them. I started to worry that I would have to go back to the stress. I wasn't sure what would happen. I continued to pray and still believed that God was not going to allow me to go back. People were going back to cases 2 by 2.
Approximately 2 weeks before my name was up to be chosen to be sent back, guess who called?! The position I had interviewed for 3 times! They offered me the position a couple of weeks before Christmas! Can you say the best Christmas gift I received in a while!!! God may not come when you want Him but He is ALWAYS right on time! I began working my new position in mid January of 2014 in my new, wonderful city that I love so much! I was blessed enough to have a wonderful friend who allowed me to stay with her and help out with her bills for a few months until I found my own place. As of 3/13/14, I received the keys to my new home and I am now a resident of my wonderful, new city!
Which brings me to my reason for not posting in a long while. I have been busy trying to get settled in. Moving to a new city is very overwhelming. My family lives some time away, not very far, but far enough. I have been trying to motivate myself to do the things I set out to do. I work new hours so I have most of my day to me. My plan for this year is to write my first book. I have not made much hedge way on it as of yet; I have an introduction and maybe page one. With all of the hustle and bustle of moving, plus work, plus buying new things for my new place, plus figuring out a budget, plus trying to find a place of worship to connect with, I have been so exhausted. I feel very bad about my lack of motivation and I almost feel like I am wasting time. I have let 3 whole months of the year go by. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I am in a wedding in May; so I have to get the dress, have it altered, get some dyeable shoes, have them died the color of the dress if I can ever get a swatch of the dress which I have requested be mailed twice and have not gotten it. There is just so much going on at one time!
I decided to force myself to do what I need to do. I have to pursue my passion because I won't progress if I don't. The good news is, I have found a wonderful church that I am planning to connect and become involved with. I am very excited about that! My life means nothing if I cannot serve in some type of way in Ministry. I have to contribute to the body! So that is one step. One accomplishment. I have unpacked and put away most all of my things; well, what I was able to get here on my own. The rest of my things at my parents' place is another story.
Have you ever been tired of feeling like every minute that passes is a wasted minute because you're not doing what you set out to do? We have to motivate ourselves! We have to carve out specific time for what it is we NEED to do, not just what we want to do. This post is the beginning for me. I realize I have encouraged so many of you with my writing, whether you voice it to me or you have just been reading through every one of the post. I am not living for myself. I know that. I would like you to accept my sincere apology. We are still on this journey together! I have not abandoned you! I am still running the race with you and we are all headed towards that which is Greater!
I hope this post gives you even a small glimmer of hope that if you continue to believe that God will not leave in the condition/position you are in for long. Keep believing, keep confessing, and keep holding on because you know what???
GREATER IS COMING!
I love you all!
Keya <3
I do apologize for the long absence in posts. I have been very, very, very busy! Still, that is no excuse for my inconsistencies. With that being said, I should catch you up on what has been going on since my last post. I may have informed you of some of these things before but I just want to be sure I have covered all of my bases.
So, since last year, around this time (it will be a year in May since my disastrous ending of engagement), God has done some pretty amazing things! I mean, doors have been opened in Ministry and in the workforce. God has catapulted me in the leading of Praise and Worship. I have been released spiritually to go forth and lead people in ushering in the presence of God through worship. Now, this may not seem like a big deal to you but it is a major deal to me.
Since I was a little girl, I have wanted to be a Psalmist. A weird fantasy for a child, I know. When I was about 8 or 9 years old, my church had a woman by the name of Diane Palmer as a guest speaker. She ministered and prophesied to people through song. I thought she was so heavenly and wonderful. At that moment, I told God I wanted to do exactly what she does! My mother bought me all of her tapes and a cassette player. I would listen to them all of the time and sing along. God placed a desire of worship in me at a very young age. I was prophesied to by Juanita Bynum when I was maybe around 11or 12. She didn't say much, just "It's on you". I was not sure exactly what "it" was at the time. Then when I was a few years older, my Pastor's wife spoke over me and told me that I would lead many to victory.
Well, the only way I have learned to achieve my own victories was through my pure, unadulterated, open heart worship. Without worship, I would not be able to survive anything the enemy has attempted to tear me down with. Whether it's singing to myself at home, listening to William McDowell or some other worship artist that ministers to my soul, or singing in the choir/congregation at church. My heart was made to worship and that is exactly why the enemy attempts so many attacks on it so much. My worship is for real. It comes directly from my heart. I need to pour my heart out to God so that He can pour Himself into it!
So, with all of that, being able to lead people to God through the avenue that I personally use to get to Him is an honor and a dream of mine! I could not have been more fulfilled by knowing that I was beginning to develop and go forth in the very thing I was created for, and people have been blessed by it! So my lesson from my heartache was that God may remove one thing from you that you loved/thought you loved so much and replace it with something even more wonderful and fulfilling. He will not allow you to be empty and lost. I am so grateful to know that God loves me so much to make sure I am happier than any mortal man could have ever made me! Leading worship is a great responsibility and an honorable privilege and I am so delighted that God chose me!
With regards to the workforce. I have a new, less stressful job! And it happens to be in the city I love!!! God knew my heart. I love to help kids and families but the stress of my previous position had begun to weigh on me so heavy that I was actually considering quitting with nothing set up to fall back on. I was ready to get out. When I returned from my month off last June, I knew it was time to go! Let me tell you how awesome God is! When you call on Him for help, He will come just when you need Him!
So, after returning back to work, there was a chance to volunteer for a work project that would remove my caseload and allow me to focus solely on the project. I would not have to go into people's homes anymore for approximately 6 months, when the project ended. Of course I volunteered but I was not chosen. I did not give up hope. I knew how tired I was and I knew God was not going to make me stay in that stressful position for long. In the mean time, I was applying for other, less stressful, position within my state trying to get an interview somewhere. I was interviewed in August of 2013 for a position that would take me out of the field and place me in an office. A much safer and way less stressful position. I did not hear anything for weeks and I began to get a little restless...BUT GOD.
While I waited on a call back from my interview, another opportunity was opened to volunteer for that same work project. The agency needed more volunteers to go outside of their current offices into different ones. Of course, in hopes of getting me off of cases, I volunteered. Still believing God was going to do something for me. He did! I was offered a volunteer position in a different county which actually happened to be closer to my parents' house, where I was living temporarily, than my actual permanent office. It worked out wonderfully! Although I was still waiting on the call from that permanent position I had interviewed for, I was able to be freed of the stress of my current position for a while, until that door opened! You ever hear the saying, "until God opens the next door, praise Him in the hallway"? Well that project was my hallway! I praised Him for that position with my belief still high that the job I interviewed for was mine!
After accepting that volunteer position, I received an invitation to interview for that other position a second time. I didn't mind. I went through with the interview in September and patiently waited for a response. I never received a yes or no for months. Finally, in December, I was asked to interview again! Third time's a charm, right? I interviewed a third time. Now while all of this was going on, some changes came about with that volunteer position. Because the deadline for the launch of the new application had been extended to an unknown date, permanent offices had begun pulling their workers back to caseloads when they needed them. I started to worry that I would have to go back to the stress. I wasn't sure what would happen. I continued to pray and still believed that God was not going to allow me to go back. People were going back to cases 2 by 2.
Approximately 2 weeks before my name was up to be chosen to be sent back, guess who called?! The position I had interviewed for 3 times! They offered me the position a couple of weeks before Christmas! Can you say the best Christmas gift I received in a while!!! God may not come when you want Him but He is ALWAYS right on time! I began working my new position in mid January of 2014 in my new, wonderful city that I love so much! I was blessed enough to have a wonderful friend who allowed me to stay with her and help out with her bills for a few months until I found my own place. As of 3/13/14, I received the keys to my new home and I am now a resident of my wonderful, new city!
Which brings me to my reason for not posting in a long while. I have been busy trying to get settled in. Moving to a new city is very overwhelming. My family lives some time away, not very far, but far enough. I have been trying to motivate myself to do the things I set out to do. I work new hours so I have most of my day to me. My plan for this year is to write my first book. I have not made much hedge way on it as of yet; I have an introduction and maybe page one. With all of the hustle and bustle of moving, plus work, plus buying new things for my new place, plus figuring out a budget, plus trying to find a place of worship to connect with, I have been so exhausted. I feel very bad about my lack of motivation and I almost feel like I am wasting time. I have let 3 whole months of the year go by. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I am in a wedding in May; so I have to get the dress, have it altered, get some dyeable shoes, have them died the color of the dress if I can ever get a swatch of the dress which I have requested be mailed twice and have not gotten it. There is just so much going on at one time!
I decided to force myself to do what I need to do. I have to pursue my passion because I won't progress if I don't. The good news is, I have found a wonderful church that I am planning to connect and become involved with. I am very excited about that! My life means nothing if I cannot serve in some type of way in Ministry. I have to contribute to the body! So that is one step. One accomplishment. I have unpacked and put away most all of my things; well, what I was able to get here on my own. The rest of my things at my parents' place is another story.
Have you ever been tired of feeling like every minute that passes is a wasted minute because you're not doing what you set out to do? We have to motivate ourselves! We have to carve out specific time for what it is we NEED to do, not just what we want to do. This post is the beginning for me. I realize I have encouraged so many of you with my writing, whether you voice it to me or you have just been reading through every one of the post. I am not living for myself. I know that. I would like you to accept my sincere apology. We are still on this journey together! I have not abandoned you! I am still running the race with you and we are all headed towards that which is Greater!
I hope this post gives you even a small glimmer of hope that if you continue to believe that God will not leave in the condition/position you are in for long. Keep believing, keep confessing, and keep holding on because you know what???
GREATER IS COMING!
I love you all!
Keya <3
Thursday, February 6, 2014
See It For What It Really Is
Hello Beautiful People!
I hope all of you are doing well on this 6th day of February! This year has been blessed for me so far! Doors are beginning to open already. It's amazing. I pray that this year will treat you way better than the last!
I want to talk about perception today. A lot of times, we can see the way things are going before they actually go that way. We can label things, not out of judgment, but because we know ourselves, our wants, our desires, and our standards. We can pretty much categorize people or relationships before we ever go another step forward. I think this is a great skill to have! By knowing up front the way something will go, we can save ourselves a lot of unnecessary wasted time and heartache.
For example, you meet a guy/girl and all you see is friendship in your future. You may even tell the person that is all you see. You two may have a blast hanging out, spending time with one another, etc. but relationally, it's never really meant to go any further than that. Then, because of the great feelings you get when you're with that person, you begin to think you are supposed to be in a romantic relationship. You two decide to enter into a romantic relationship, involving yourselves at some of the most intimate levels. Things appear to be going wonderfully then something tragic happens that destroys the relationship and the friendship goes down with it. You feel horrible, then you remember, before it all started all you saw was friendship from the start.
I've been there and I am sure I am not the only one who has. Because we allow feeling to get in the way and control our decisions, we lose great friends who we probably had the most fun with. It's sad at times. We cause ourselves such great heartache. This is why in my opinion, we need to see and ACCEPT relationships for what they really are. Let friendships be friendships. It can save you so much time and one of the best friendships you could have ever had.
I am grateful for all of the experiences I have been allowed and I continue to grow and learn from everything that I have been through. Accepting relationships for what they really are can be hard but it can also be the best thing you could ever do for yourself and the other person involved. You will be happier and avoid painful experiences. So, whether you are friends with a person or your are in a relationship with a person now; evaluate your relationship. It can save you and that other person a lot of trouble, time and most of all...you can save a friendship!
No matter what happens, always know....GREATER IS COMING!!!
I hope all of you are doing well on this 6th day of February! This year has been blessed for me so far! Doors are beginning to open already. It's amazing. I pray that this year will treat you way better than the last!
I want to talk about perception today. A lot of times, we can see the way things are going before they actually go that way. We can label things, not out of judgment, but because we know ourselves, our wants, our desires, and our standards. We can pretty much categorize people or relationships before we ever go another step forward. I think this is a great skill to have! By knowing up front the way something will go, we can save ourselves a lot of unnecessary wasted time and heartache.
For example, you meet a guy/girl and all you see is friendship in your future. You may even tell the person that is all you see. You two may have a blast hanging out, spending time with one another, etc. but relationally, it's never really meant to go any further than that. Then, because of the great feelings you get when you're with that person, you begin to think you are supposed to be in a romantic relationship. You two decide to enter into a romantic relationship, involving yourselves at some of the most intimate levels. Things appear to be going wonderfully then something tragic happens that destroys the relationship and the friendship goes down with it. You feel horrible, then you remember, before it all started all you saw was friendship from the start.
I've been there and I am sure I am not the only one who has. Because we allow feeling to get in the way and control our decisions, we lose great friends who we probably had the most fun with. It's sad at times. We cause ourselves such great heartache. This is why in my opinion, we need to see and ACCEPT relationships for what they really are. Let friendships be friendships. It can save you so much time and one of the best friendships you could have ever had.
I am grateful for all of the experiences I have been allowed and I continue to grow and learn from everything that I have been through. Accepting relationships for what they really are can be hard but it can also be the best thing you could ever do for yourself and the other person involved. You will be happier and avoid painful experiences. So, whether you are friends with a person or your are in a relationship with a person now; evaluate your relationship. It can save you and that other person a lot of trouble, time and most of all...you can save a friendship!
No matter what happens, always know....GREATER IS COMING!!!
Thursday, January 9, 2014
Repairing, Restoring, and Receiving! ALL YEAR!
Welcome to 2014!!!! You made it!
Even though you may have thought 2013 had beat you up so bad that there was no point in going on, you made it! You have a new chance at a fresh start. I know, any day can be a fresh start, but there is something psychologically special about starting a New Year. You can say things now like, I have not gotten my heart broken all year, or I have not had a drink of alcohol all year, or I have not sinned in fornication all year, or I have been working out all year!! And now, it's up to you to keep whatever your "all year" statement is true through to 2015! It's like you have brand new clean slate! Everything that happened in 2013 that was not for your benefit is left back there!
I, for one, am very excited about the great manifestations that I see coming this year! God is up to something amazing because He helped me end 2013 so strong! I have been getting the notion that 2014 is the year God is repairing some things that have been broken WAY too long! He is mending relationships, restoring families, and healing wounds. He is going to be pouring out His Spirit in ways never imagined before and all we have to do is receive!
It is time to look forward, toward the Greater things ahead and allow God to reign down on us His magnificent power and anointing. I challenge you to take full advantage of the blessings and gifts God is pouring out this year! I am believing that due to the Repairing, Restoring and Receiving, this year is going to be a breakout year for so many of us! It will be a matte of us accepting His marvelous grace and allowing our gifts to make room for us.
The work has already begun! 2014 is YOUR YEAR! 2014 is MY YEAR! We can say things like, God has been using me ALL YEAR, God has been repairing broken areas in my life ALL YEAR, God has been restoring relationships in my family ALL YEAR, and I have been receiving in abundance ALL YEAR! Walk in His grace all year! Be a living vessel for Him all year! Manifest His glory all year!
Greater is here! Take it! And walk in it ALL YEAR!!!
Even though you may have thought 2013 had beat you up so bad that there was no point in going on, you made it! You have a new chance at a fresh start. I know, any day can be a fresh start, but there is something psychologically special about starting a New Year. You can say things now like, I have not gotten my heart broken all year, or I have not had a drink of alcohol all year, or I have not sinned in fornication all year, or I have been working out all year!! And now, it's up to you to keep whatever your "all year" statement is true through to 2015! It's like you have brand new clean slate! Everything that happened in 2013 that was not for your benefit is left back there!
I, for one, am very excited about the great manifestations that I see coming this year! God is up to something amazing because He helped me end 2013 so strong! I have been getting the notion that 2014 is the year God is repairing some things that have been broken WAY too long! He is mending relationships, restoring families, and healing wounds. He is going to be pouring out His Spirit in ways never imagined before and all we have to do is receive!
It is time to look forward, toward the Greater things ahead and allow God to reign down on us His magnificent power and anointing. I challenge you to take full advantage of the blessings and gifts God is pouring out this year! I am believing that due to the Repairing, Restoring and Receiving, this year is going to be a breakout year for so many of us! It will be a matte of us accepting His marvelous grace and allowing our gifts to make room for us.
The work has already begun! 2014 is YOUR YEAR! 2014 is MY YEAR! We can say things like, God has been using me ALL YEAR, God has been repairing broken areas in my life ALL YEAR, God has been restoring relationships in my family ALL YEAR, and I have been receiving in abundance ALL YEAR! Walk in His grace all year! Be a living vessel for Him all year! Manifest His glory all year!
Greater is here! Take it! And walk in it ALL YEAR!!!
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Never Look Back!
Hi all!
I would first like to start off by apologizing for my failure to keep up with my commitment to write daily. I will try to do better.
Nonetheless, God has continued to do great things! As this year comes to a close, I can't help but recap the events that have occurred in 2013. This has brought some good and not so good thoughts about. There has definitely been some major changes in my life this year, some of my own volition and some not.
So let's recap: I began the new year celebrating at church with my, then, boyfriend and his amazing 9 years old son. On April 4th, my boyfriend of 2 years asked me to marry him! I was elated despite some small reservations that I was more than willing to overlook due to love. On May 5th, I discovered my fiancé had gotten a woman, whom he had been seeing in his work office for the past few years behind my back and lying to my face every day of our relationship, pregnant. I ended the engagement and relationship overall. I spent my summer hurting from the disappointment, betrayal and utter embarrassment. I cried out to God and gave Him my broken heart. I shared my experiences through my healing process in my blog posts and I have been blessed by the great impact my testimony and sharing has had on other people's lives and situations. I truly am honored to be the vessel God has chosen to help so many others. The pain drove me straight into His arms, where I found safety, true love, acceptance, comfort and so much more. I truly believe that God loves me too much to ever allow me to be a part of something that will cause me nothing but misery and strife. I also believe with all my heart that I am His baby and that vengeance belongs to Him. I feel sorry for the wrongdoers and those who failed to see God's hand on my life and decided to treat me carelessly. All I can do is pray that God has mercy on them.
As my hurt subsided and I began to really see the blessing in the situation, God brought someone into my life who has begun to show me what it really means to love, honor and cherish a precious woman of God. I have never felt so treasured and adored. Still, taking things slow and keeping everything before God, I am enjoying the love that I have been receiving and I am grateful that my heart was not hardened due to the foolishness of the previous guy who was blind to what God placed in front of Him.
Side note: There is nothing wrong with knowing your worth and being confident in it. Don't let anyone make you feel bad about who you are, who God created you to be, and the standards you hold! You were fearfully and WONDERFULLY made! Walk in your TRUE identity and if a person cannot accept that, then you don't need that person. Be YOU!
The way I deal with my painful life situations is through worship to God. It's the way I get out all of my tears and frustrations. I honor the Lord for His hand on my life and I know He has great plans for me. With that being said, my worship has gone to a new level this year! I have always known that God has called me to be a leader of worship. He has begun developing my gift of worship as I have been asked by my wonderful church, Family Worship Center Church-Flint, to lead worship service more! As exciting as it sounds, I recognize it is a great responsibility and my prayer is that others can release all of their hurt through their worship like I do and that they will experience a true encounter with the Lord like I do! All I ever want is for God to meet us right in the midst of our worship! I am excited that God is beginning to do just that through my worship and 2014 is about to be the breakout year!
Last but not least, I continue to move forward even in my career endeavors. I have been praying for the past year or so about my job. It had begun to get very stressful and I know it is not what God had for me for the rest of my life. This December I was offered a new job! And to top it all off, the job is in the city that I have always said I would love to live in!!! I am very excited about the change. I will be starting the job in January! So, as you can see...God has been doing some GREAT things! I told you that Greater was coming!
You can imagine that I have had some exciting things going on theses last few months of the year. I had a great birthday in September and I have had nonstop happiness and continual joy, with some occasional lows of course. But my lowest low came when I decided to take a look back at that which I had walked away from. Now, I should let you know if you don't know already, there will come a time that you get curious about what's going on with your old news guy/girl. Who doesn't? It's natural. What you may find may not always be what you need. I would say, 100% of the time, it's never what you need. My decision to take a look back, which is very easy to do with the advancements of technology, was not one of my wisest moments. Initially, it was a test of how far I had come and quite frankly I was very proud of myself at first because the effect was not negative at all. I felt nothing. Sometimes though, we can go a little further into things than we need to and find things we really should not have. That's when the thoughts began to roll back in, constantly. Thoughts of all of the lies, what was a lie and what was the truth, did the person really ever even love me, what is so great about this other person that they are publicly with and have now made a complete "Brady Bunch" family with now? I would say I am a great catch and have way more to offer than the other...etc.
ATTENTION: LOOKING BACK IS A BIG MISTAKE!!!
My advice, leave them and all that involves them where they are...behind you! Keep looking forward. Be sure to let those who love you, friends or anyone who may know the person you left in your past just that. They are in your past and you want nothing more to do with them. You don't want to know any news about them, good or bad! What good is it going to do you to know what is going on in their lives? Whether you hear that they are doing horribly, their life is falling apart or that they are happier than ever...neither piece of information is going to benefit you one way or the other. Yes, you may get some sense of pleasure to know that they are unhappy and things have fallen apart since you left but is it prospering you any? No. Is it making you a better person or advancing you in life? No. Keep your focus on things ahead of you. Keep your eye on the great things God has for you ahead and He will deal with them. He removed them from your life for a reason so don't try to bring them back in any way, shape or form. Disconnect completely! As hard as it may be, it has to be done. I, for one, know it is hard. It's really hard when you have connected with children. All you can do is cover the kids in prayer as well.
God has so many great things in store for you. Don't stifle yourself because you can't seem to keep your focus ahead of you. You cannot drive forward if you keep your eyes in the rearview mirror! You're just going to crash and burn. I would say that I had a slight fender bender but I am back on the road again with my eyes straight ahead and I can see my destination as I get closer and closer to it!
Leave everything that happened to you that impacted your life in negative way in 2013. Don't take it with you. Let it all disappear with the year. That's what I plan to do. It may be that I have to let some other people go who will constantly try to bring the dead back to life, and you may have to also but it is time to think about YOU. Think about your progress! I'm moving forward! Are you?
GREATER IS COMING! KEEP YOUR EYES FOCUSED AHEAD!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU! I can't wait to hear how God blesses your 2014! Please, share with me your great things! Let me praise with you! I am praising for you in advance! Chase your Greater!
I would first like to start off by apologizing for my failure to keep up with my commitment to write daily. I will try to do better.
Nonetheless, God has continued to do great things! As this year comes to a close, I can't help but recap the events that have occurred in 2013. This has brought some good and not so good thoughts about. There has definitely been some major changes in my life this year, some of my own volition and some not.
So let's recap: I began the new year celebrating at church with my, then, boyfriend and his amazing 9 years old son. On April 4th, my boyfriend of 2 years asked me to marry him! I was elated despite some small reservations that I was more than willing to overlook due to love. On May 5th, I discovered my fiancé had gotten a woman, whom he had been seeing in his work office for the past few years behind my back and lying to my face every day of our relationship, pregnant. I ended the engagement and relationship overall. I spent my summer hurting from the disappointment, betrayal and utter embarrassment. I cried out to God and gave Him my broken heart. I shared my experiences through my healing process in my blog posts and I have been blessed by the great impact my testimony and sharing has had on other people's lives and situations. I truly am honored to be the vessel God has chosen to help so many others. The pain drove me straight into His arms, where I found safety, true love, acceptance, comfort and so much more. I truly believe that God loves me too much to ever allow me to be a part of something that will cause me nothing but misery and strife. I also believe with all my heart that I am His baby and that vengeance belongs to Him. I feel sorry for the wrongdoers and those who failed to see God's hand on my life and decided to treat me carelessly. All I can do is pray that God has mercy on them.
As my hurt subsided and I began to really see the blessing in the situation, God brought someone into my life who has begun to show me what it really means to love, honor and cherish a precious woman of God. I have never felt so treasured and adored. Still, taking things slow and keeping everything before God, I am enjoying the love that I have been receiving and I am grateful that my heart was not hardened due to the foolishness of the previous guy who was blind to what God placed in front of Him.
Side note: There is nothing wrong with knowing your worth and being confident in it. Don't let anyone make you feel bad about who you are, who God created you to be, and the standards you hold! You were fearfully and WONDERFULLY made! Walk in your TRUE identity and if a person cannot accept that, then you don't need that person. Be YOU!
The way I deal with my painful life situations is through worship to God. It's the way I get out all of my tears and frustrations. I honor the Lord for His hand on my life and I know He has great plans for me. With that being said, my worship has gone to a new level this year! I have always known that God has called me to be a leader of worship. He has begun developing my gift of worship as I have been asked by my wonderful church, Family Worship Center Church-Flint, to lead worship service more! As exciting as it sounds, I recognize it is a great responsibility and my prayer is that others can release all of their hurt through their worship like I do and that they will experience a true encounter with the Lord like I do! All I ever want is for God to meet us right in the midst of our worship! I am excited that God is beginning to do just that through my worship and 2014 is about to be the breakout year!
Last but not least, I continue to move forward even in my career endeavors. I have been praying for the past year or so about my job. It had begun to get very stressful and I know it is not what God had for me for the rest of my life. This December I was offered a new job! And to top it all off, the job is in the city that I have always said I would love to live in!!! I am very excited about the change. I will be starting the job in January! So, as you can see...God has been doing some GREAT things! I told you that Greater was coming!
You can imagine that I have had some exciting things going on theses last few months of the year. I had a great birthday in September and I have had nonstop happiness and continual joy, with some occasional lows of course. But my lowest low came when I decided to take a look back at that which I had walked away from. Now, I should let you know if you don't know already, there will come a time that you get curious about what's going on with your old news guy/girl. Who doesn't? It's natural. What you may find may not always be what you need. I would say, 100% of the time, it's never what you need. My decision to take a look back, which is very easy to do with the advancements of technology, was not one of my wisest moments. Initially, it was a test of how far I had come and quite frankly I was very proud of myself at first because the effect was not negative at all. I felt nothing. Sometimes though, we can go a little further into things than we need to and find things we really should not have. That's when the thoughts began to roll back in, constantly. Thoughts of all of the lies, what was a lie and what was the truth, did the person really ever even love me, what is so great about this other person that they are publicly with and have now made a complete "Brady Bunch" family with now? I would say I am a great catch and have way more to offer than the other...etc.
ATTENTION: LOOKING BACK IS A BIG MISTAKE!!!
My advice, leave them and all that involves them where they are...behind you! Keep looking forward. Be sure to let those who love you, friends or anyone who may know the person you left in your past just that. They are in your past and you want nothing more to do with them. You don't want to know any news about them, good or bad! What good is it going to do you to know what is going on in their lives? Whether you hear that they are doing horribly, their life is falling apart or that they are happier than ever...neither piece of information is going to benefit you one way or the other. Yes, you may get some sense of pleasure to know that they are unhappy and things have fallen apart since you left but is it prospering you any? No. Is it making you a better person or advancing you in life? No. Keep your focus on things ahead of you. Keep your eye on the great things God has for you ahead and He will deal with them. He removed them from your life for a reason so don't try to bring them back in any way, shape or form. Disconnect completely! As hard as it may be, it has to be done. I, for one, know it is hard. It's really hard when you have connected with children. All you can do is cover the kids in prayer as well.
God has so many great things in store for you. Don't stifle yourself because you can't seem to keep your focus ahead of you. You cannot drive forward if you keep your eyes in the rearview mirror! You're just going to crash and burn. I would say that I had a slight fender bender but I am back on the road again with my eyes straight ahead and I can see my destination as I get closer and closer to it!
Leave everything that happened to you that impacted your life in negative way in 2013. Don't take it with you. Let it all disappear with the year. That's what I plan to do. It may be that I have to let some other people go who will constantly try to bring the dead back to life, and you may have to also but it is time to think about YOU. Think about your progress! I'm moving forward! Are you?
GREATER IS COMING! KEEP YOUR EYES FOCUSED AHEAD!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU! I can't wait to hear how God blesses your 2014! Please, share with me your great things! Let me praise with you! I am praising for you in advance! Chase your Greater!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)